Will Bob Jones University Emulate the Roger Clemens Non-Apology Model?

My [unsolicited] advice to those who are petitioning BJU to apologize for the University's racial bigotry and interracial dating/marriage ban is this:

First, one must proceed with caution when dealing with the Joneses/BJU. They are crafty people.

Secondly, never let the Joneses/BJU frame an issue or allow them to "flank" you in your efforts to pressure them to issue a meaningful apology.

The Roger Clemens Non Apology

Baseball Hall of Famer Roger Clemens filed a defamation suit alleging that his reputation was hurt by allegations of steroids.

In an effort to appear to apologize without admitting wrongdoing, Roger Clemens issued a non apology of sorts Monday for unspecified "mistakes" in his personal life.

Clemens apparently had a decade long relationship with country star Mindy McCready that began when she was 15 and an aspiring singer. The seven-time Cy Young Award winner was also linked to former Manhattan bartender Angela Moyer and Paulette Dean Daly, a former wife of champion golfer John Daly.

Clemens denied having an affair with a 15-year-old but didn't specifically address whether he had a romance with McCready.

"Even though these articles contain many false accusations and mistakes, I need to say that I have made mistakes in my personal life for which I am sorry," Clemens said in a statement issued by spokesman Patrick Dorton. "I have apologized to my family and apologize to my fans. Like everyone, I have flaws. I have sometimes made choices which have not been right."

Everybody makes "mistakes" and most people regularly admit when they do. But, note how Clemens links articles that contain many unspecified "false accusations and mistakes" with the admission (that all people have to make regarding innocent mistakes) that he has made "mistakes in my personal life for which I am sorry...I have apologized to my family and apologize to my fans..." What are these "mistakes" for which he feels the need to apologize? Did he make a wrong turn in the car? Did he throw the baseball to the wrong base?

In my view, Clemens did not issue an apology in any way, shape, or form. Genuine apologies always include an admission of the specific wrong[s] done, repentance for deliberately violating a moral or social standard, and include a plea for forgiveness from the one[s] wronged. A genuine apology doesn't dance around personal guilt and responsibility by merely admitting to have made a "mistake". A married man having sexual relations with other women and/or with an underaged girl isn't merely a "mistake," it is a sin AND a crime.

"I think what it says without saying it is that he apparently admits he cheated on his wife and family. And if he cheated on them, I think it's reasonable to assume that he cheated his fans and baseball," Richard Emery, one of the lawyers defending against Clemens' defamation suit, said in a telephone interview.

"I think this is all very probative of his behavior and his penchant for denying the truth, and it certainly will come into play in the defamation lawsuit. He certainly doesn't deserve to be compensated for loss of reputation when his reputation, to the extent he ever had it, of being a family man, was totally false and built on a house a cards, a tissue of lies, if you will."

"I believe my personal life has nothing to do with the accusations of steroid and HGH use," Clemens said. "I have already made clear that I did not use them. Now, I have been accused of having an improper relationship with a 15-year old girl. Nothing could be further from the truth. This relationship has been twisted and distorted far beyond reality. It is just one of many, many accusations that are utterly false.

"I realize that many people want me to simply confess and apologize for the conduct that I have been accused of, but I cannot confess to, nor apologize for, things I did not do. I have apologized to my family for my mistakes, and having offered this apology to the public, I would ask that you let me and my family deal with these matters in private."

Clemens' lawyer, Rusty Hardin, said last week he will talk with his client about whether to proceed with the defamation suit following the wave of unpleasant publicity.

"He's getting pummeled," Hardin said. "I've never seen somebody get beat up like this. In some ways, I think we're on uncharted ground."

"That's always a decision the client has to make," Hardin said. "That's not the lawyer's decision."

(Source: The Deseret News)

Unlike Roger Clemens, the Joneses have never admitted to even "a mistake" regarding the interracial dating/marriage ban. Up to March, 2000, Bob Jones III adamantly declared the Rule was based upon "Bible policy" and that BJU would stick to the Rule. Bob Jones III changed his tune in the face of political pressure and lied about the essence of the Rule on Larry King Live. The Joneses have never come to terms with the truth regarding their interracial dating/marriage ban: It was sinful, it was not "Bible policy," it harmed people, and they must beg forgiveness and seek to make restitution to those they have wronged with the Rule.

Based upon the past behavior of the Joneses, no one should trust them to craft an apology that will amount to anything more meaningful than that which Clemens has crafted. Both Clemens and the Joneses/BJU are interested in just two things: image management and damage control.

Support and encourage those who have taken the lead on the BJU Petition drive at Pleasereconcile.blogspot.com/.

And, hope that the leaders of the BJU Petition drive will keep the pressure on the Joneses/BJU to issue a genuine, meaningful apology that will include an unqualified admission of wrongdoing and an acknowledgment of the deception they used to mitigate the damage done to their reputations. The Joneses/BJU also need to admit the fraud they used to perpetuate the Rule. They also need to name those they have wronged, beg forgiveness from each person and/or group they have defrauded, and seek to make restitution.

The Joneses/BJU have never taken such a step. Let's hope this time they react differently than they have in the past.

Comments

[Bill Lamb]

The implication of uncharted territory insofar as Roger Clemens is concerned is hardly uncharted. The territory in which he walked and the "apology" he issued comes right out of the playbook of former President Bill Clinton. That's precisely the opening statement he made, with very slight variations, in his televised "deposition" with Special Prosecutor Kenneth Starr.

Bill Lamb

[mary davis]

My brother sent me your link--o the stories i could tell! i am delighted to know that my dad, Charles Underwood, finally got press for his toe to toe with the joneses. i could tell of many other toe to toe encounters and the trememdous time and effort wasted which could have been devoted to kingdom work instead (nothing more useful for diverting Jesus' followers than these kinds of things!)...but unless you want the details, it's so much better to go on.
The Emperor has ALWAYS been naked at BJU. And the choice was always, from start to finish, whether or not you were willing to agree with the majority or if you were willing to say, "HEY! this is a lie! this guy is NAKED!" and be banned, harrassed, banished, etc.
interesting to note that one of my favorite bits of poetry learned during my stay at BJU was Emily Dickinson's---
"Much madness is divinest sense
to a discerning eye;
Much sense, the starkest madness:
Tis the majority in this, as all, prevails.
Assent, and you are sane;
Demur, you're straightway dangerous
and handled with a chain."

the interrracial thing was ESPECIALLY ridiculous when my Virginia-born friend was told she could not date Dave because she was of Filipino heritage. She COULD, however, date Wayne because he was Japanese! (so what does that say about the Spanish portion of her DNA? was she still HALF interracially dating?!)

it will go on in its many forms until the ENTIRE organiztion chooses to tell the truth. Blessings on you for posting such truth.

Mark Responds: Charles Underwood's Open letter to Bob Jones III was like balm to me when I received it. Your father essentially codified the Jonesian modus operandi, an almost robotic script for the Joneses' handling of every controversy in which they engaged.

But, Charles Underwood's 1983 letter is so en pointe and such strong medicine that many people refuse to read it or even acknowledge that it exists.

I invited Louis Hensler to read CU's letter because Hensler acted like the only thing wrong with BJU was those who graduated from there who didn't worship everything Jonesian. To enlighten him to the pervasive pragmatic expediency that has come to characterize the Joneses' leadership-style, I invited Louis Hensler to read CU's Open Letter as it was written during the time Hensler attended BJU and it accurately reflected the ethical atmosphere that permeated BJU at the time.

While I suspect Louis Hensler read the letter privately (and decided connivance and feigned ignorance were more beneficial to his interests), he ridiculed me for asking him to read a letter written some 25 years ago! The sad truth is, Charles Underwood's old letter is almost as up-to-date today as it was the day he penned it.

You have every right to be proud of your father, Charles Underwood, and the stand he took against evil doing and for righteousness. I only regret he did not have the internet! And, I wish I could have met him. Mark

BTW, I would appreciate any future comments from you being appended to the post dedicated to Charles Underwood's Open Letter to Bob Jones III.

[Stephen]

I really appreciate your posts. Shine a light, brother. For what it's worth, here's a summary of my experience with the Bob Jones mentality.

http://waterstoswim.blogspot.com/2008/06/goodbye-to-all-that.html

I could write a whole book about that crowd. Suffice it to say, I will never set foot in another Bob Jones church in my lifetime.

[The Squire]

They were like that through the 1990's.

I think their ways came home to roost in the 2000 election year when Bob III was heard to cry to Larry King that he felt so bad for the graduates and students of BJU who were now being looked down on by the masses for having an affiliation with BJU.(Bju being exposed as a supremist cult)

Bob III got the hot lamp tratment from the democrats and the media and could not defend his policies of the past nor give a good answer as to why his school held such a racially devisive philosophy for all those years.

I can think of the thousands of BJU students whom were tried under the Jonese's "hot lamp" treatment over the years to confess to breaking one of their precious rules.

I think BJU got what it deserved.....lower student enrollment, Bob III stepping down and a host of the old confederate line going into retirement or simply slinking off to other "Bible" churches.

The wine went terribly sour at BJU back then.

[Michael]

WOW....I found your site and laughed out loud. I actually visited Bob Jones University in the 80's and thought about attending. What I found was so outside the box of what they taught I was floored. Now don't get me wrong, it was refreshing that the students I encountered were "human", but it was the false wall that surrounded the University Reputation that turned me off.

What I found in the dorm room I shared for 3 days with students form the University were normal teenage boys, full of hormones, hyped up on sugar, running the halls naked, mooning each other, and a lot of other late night activities that one does alone as a young man.

Again, it wasn't that this bothered me, it was that the school forced these kids into a World of unreality. The expectations were so demanding that they students needed an outlet to let loose.

Anyway, thanks for shining the light.